Important places on Google Maps for me

  • My mother’s last house
  • My last apartment in London
    There were four apartments – mine was the lower right above the garage.   The SMOKING HOT crackhead Lisa lived above me.   The thin side window on the right closest to the edge of the building on my apartment is the window that Lisa’s crackhead buddies crept in and burgled my place.
  • More House
    The place where I spent most of my formative years rebelling against Father McCabe.   The newer buildings in the back didn’t used to be there, and neither did the newer building to the left of the main house.   This is the place where I still have most amount of my happiest memories.   Seeing the house redeveloped like this makes me a little sad for some reason.
  • Crendon Park
    This is the road where all of my worst memories and childhood experiences happened.   In the main group of houses in the centre, on the bottom row… the fourth house from the left is number 8. That is where (to my knowledge still) Myra and Derek Anscombe live.   Without going into too much detail they are my former foster parents who abused me terribly – so badly their son Martin checked himself into a psychiatric unit when he was an adult.   If you view this shot of the football fields near their house… you’ll see a small path going along the right side of it.   That path was paved with sharp stone chips when I was six years old and that path holds very bad memories for me.     In the centre of this image you can view a group of flats (apartments) where I had to go and scrounge food daily from the dumpsters in the concrete parking lot on the lower side of the flats.   Very many bad bad things happened to me there which still have an effect on how I react to various situations nearly twenty-five years later.

Ryan Paul

A British expat living in a state of deep hatred for the types of people produced in Kenora.

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16 Responses

  1. redlipsrosycheeks says:

    That is awful, we’re they ever tried for it? Did people know? Sorry to be intrusive.

  2. Ryan Paul says:

    I was awarded a bit of money twenty years back as compensation but they were never brought to trial.
    I imagine the Statute of Limitations would bar them from prosecution by now.

  3. redlipsrosycheeks says:

    Was there no evidence then? Sorry for asking only I do study law and have been through foster care and abuse myself.

  4. redlipsrosycheeks says:

    Also, would you never want to find them and bring them to trial or at least try? We’re there other children who went through the same who could help?

  5. Ryan Paul says:

    The evidence is still over my body. If you look at my back there are deep red welts still there 30yrs later from being whipped with a plastic barb brush, as well as scars on my forehead from having a milk bottle broken over it, scar on my arm from being stabbed with a peeling knife, and a scar on my back from having a pool cue broken over it.
    Their own son had a nervous breakdown and checked himself into an institution – I found out after they fostered a disabled kid in a wheel chair and abused him too.
    I’d love to have them face justice – but I always figured I’d rather find them, give them a photo of my children and say “I didn’t become like you” and walk away.

  6. redlipsrosycheeks says:

    Did they have any other children of their own or just the son? Did they do things to him or was it just the foster children? Sad too see you were not the only one. If the evidence was all over your body I just simply cannot understand why they were not prosecuted! What year was this if you don’t mind me asking? It’s just I was wondering what laws towards child protection have changed since then as I can’t see people getting away with that today. Do you think you will try and find them one day? They must be old now so I reckon if you do then it should be soon. I can’t help but wonder if they are the same people now. Maybe they have changed although I can’t see how and why that kind of change would come about. I am sorry if you feel this is personal, please stop replying at any time if it’s too much. That would be entirely understandable.
    I think it’s very brave to speak out about this although I am sure you have probably heard that a lot. I would never have the guts to do it.

  7. Ryan Paul says:

    They had two sons of their own. From what I heard it was just the foster child they abused. I’m pretty certain they emotionally abused their younger son but not physically. Their older son was a cruel bastard who I still hate to this day.
    I’m pretty sure the year was between 1984 – 1985.

    I’d like to find them one day just so I could tell them to their face that I didn’t become like them. I wish them no harm – shitty people have shitty lives and I have no doubt that their lives aren’t stellar.

  8. redlipsrosycheeks says:

    I am so sorry about what you went through.
    You must have only been young. Five or six? What was so cruel about the older son? Was it both of your foster parents or mainly just one of them who did this? Final questions I promise.

  9. Ryan Paul says:

    I was with them for two years. The first year was like a normal family because they knew that at the end of that year I was going to have a visit with my mother.
    After that last visit that’s when things went sour. I’m pretty certain it was my sixth year that the horrors began.
    The older son had a cruel streak – he would steal things from the kitchen like cupcakes, and chocolate nests, intimidate me into being quiet and then stand by and watch as I took the blame and was mercilessly thrashed.
    Derek Anscombe would hit me once in a while more or less the same as any other dad would but his crime was doing nothing and standing by watching his monstrous wife hurt an innocent child. Myra was the sadistic one. She was the one that did all the harm… that lied to social workers, and teachers.
    I testified in a criminal trial against them when I was 16 but their lawyer argued that because it was so long ago I might not remember the details correctly. The Recorder agreed and ordered the jury to acquit which they did and that was the end of that.

  10. redlipsrosycheeks says:

    I could see why their lawyer would argue that but you would be surprised what children remember at that age so it’s a rather weak argument. I wonder if she had a bad background and was at any point in care. It would explain why she did such things. Not justify it though. As for the husband, it’s weird how love works because he did what he did to protect her. I wonder if alcohol was ever involved and why their own children never got treated that way. People must have seen the marks and I don’t get how they could have lied about it without people knowing it’s serious.
    It really makes you think if children are safe or not.

  11. Ryan Paul says:

    Well in my case in particular – back in that day not much weight was given to the words of brown kids. I’m not very dark but compared to my peers I was the only non-white kid there.
    The bruises, cuts, and welts were noticed very early on but Myra Anscombe kept telling people that I was doing it to myself. The teachers finally clicked on that a 6yr old boy wasn’t putting adult sized handprints on his back and that’s when the real investigation started.
    Children aren’t safe at all in care homes. Sadly due to Myra I was traumatized and fucked around my next foster mother who was actually very very nice.
    What’s even worse is that we only went into care because my mother’s babysitter had a personal issue with my mum and lied to the police. It may sound biased but my mother really was fit and capable. But back then because she was black nobody was willing to believe her story.

  12. redlipsrosycheeks says:

    That’s so sad. Part of me feels things haven’t changed even now. I just wonder what made her like that and whether she has changed now. Her children will all be grown up, maybe even have children of their own. It would be weird to find that out I think. Thank you for telling me your story. I really appreciate it.

  13. Ryan Paul says:

    Well about a year or so ago I became friends with the younger son.

    He was in contact with his brother frequently but apparently his parents completely stopped talking to him after he revealed all to the police. I don’t think he had any children – seemed to emotionally unstable. Not violent unstable just all fucked up because of what he’d witnessed etc.
    I’m not sure about the older son. I hope not. He wasn’t a nice person and would be liable to teach his children the way he was taught.

  14. redlipsrosycheeks says:

    Friends? Do you speak to the younger son much? I did some research into the family and looked through some online records. The older son has a daughter but is unmarried.

  15. Ryan Paul says:

    Email me through my contact form.

  16. Teri Southgate ??? says:

    Hi Ryan Paul, my name is Teri, I lived with Myra and Derek when I was about 3 on and off until I was 7, I was the only girl who lived with them, I don’t remember a lot but I do know they did get some sort of cummumpance and had to move away (Cornwall I think) it seems all a blur but need answers if that makes sense? How did u get hold of Martin? I always remember him being the nicer brother, calm and took me out to the cinema.

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